The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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