Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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