I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize