Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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