they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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