I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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