she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Who died my cat blue again?
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
