But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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