it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
