You smell like stripper and shame
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
