the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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