I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Randomize
