He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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