The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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