First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
