I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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