Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
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