My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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