Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
