wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
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No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
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I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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