You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
