my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
