Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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