sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
