don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
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