Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
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I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
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I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
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