You made me cry and you don't even care
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
