at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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