nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
