kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
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