I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
You've changed since you got that strap on
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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