oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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