i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
