I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
