My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
