the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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