We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Randomize
