So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
handjob tips. give me some.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
