Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
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The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
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i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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