tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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