I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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