drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
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