Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
