don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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