You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
