You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
