can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
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There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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