he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
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