You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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