My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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