I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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