This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
