I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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